Out in the ocean where everything is set in motion.
The waves, they crash, and with it my heart feels the commotion.

Up and down the way they move.

Round and round my thoughts confused.

How can a simple thought turn to a dark source.

The light illuminates but the screams are hoarse.

They say the only way a heart is open, is when its broken.

But the soul freezes, and the walls become the unspoken.

Grey is the color that took my mother.

Green is the color my skin had as cover.

This is the day you got your freedom.

This is the day I was beaten.

I know the guilt you feel for loving this day.

How the breath of fresh air came your way.

I watched you as you became smaller and smaller.

In my head, it replays over and over.

The sun

The wind

The heat

My feet

They are not running after you.

They are pinned down on the ground looking blue.

My blood stopped.

As my heart dropped.

Now, I pour my darkened soul that was taken over by this hole.

I pour it all down the gutter to try and make me whole.

But what if life takes its toll.

And the thing that gave you warmth makes you cold.

What if I had control over my feet.

And ran after you in the midst of your fleet.

Will it be any different ?

Will I still feel this feeling of false healing.

Knees kneeling till they are numb from weeping.

Grey is the color that took my mother.

Black is the color I painted the gutter.